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Monday, June 25, 2012

Mrs. Contentment

I went to a wedding a few weeks ago… *le sigh* and it was beautiful!  Normally, I wouldn’t be too excited about going to a wedding, as a single woman (with no date).  But this one, in particular, was one I had been looking forward to attending for a while.

As my ridiculously beautiful friend walked down a gorgeous staircase to take the hand of her soon-to-be husband, I was filled with joy and thoughts of well-wishes for the happy couple.  This was surprising to me, not because it was an unusual feeling to have, but because I had prepared myself for feelings of envy and sadness for myself and when that didn’t happen, it was a complicated feeling.

It makes me feel horrible and selfish, inconsiderate and rude to know that I had actually prepared myself to feel this way! And on top of that, it didn’t even happen! I love this couple. They are my friends, so don’t get me wrong, the feelings I thought I would have were completely personal and had nothing to do with my being happy for them and wishing them the best.

I don’t know about you, but there was a time in my life (and it actually wasn’t that long ago) where I would take the things that were happening to other people in their lives and make it about me! I would ask myself why they were chosen to have “whatever” happened to them instead of me! How selfish is that?!?

Well, I’m better… I’m happy!  I’m accepting and content with where my experiences have placed me, not only physically but emotionally, as well…

The experience of being unselfishly happy for my friends was AMAZING! I was so surprised with how refreshing it was to just be happy for someone else and not worry about the “have not’s” in my own life!  I cried tears of joy for them, instead of tears of sorrow for myself… How great is that!?!  I am STILL happy for them and know that they will have all their hearts’ desire…

Forgive my excitement, but to FINALLY be content with where I am in life has been a LONG time coming! And until a "Mr" finds me and wants to call me his "Mrs" just call me Mrs. Contentment!

Table for One please… HAPPY & CONTENT… Love me or leave me alone…

BACK TO HAPPY TIP: Find a way to smile every day…  Smiles are healing!

Monday, June 18, 2012

Where My Girls At?!?


As a single woman, I for one, find so much comfort in confiding in and talking to my single friends.  Not all of my friends are single; some of them are married with children.  But, for the most part, the women I interact with on a daily basis are young, beautiful, successful and living happy lives… They also happen to be single.

The more and more I think about it, I realize that we are more than likely in each other’s lives for a reason.  I don’t know about y’all, but at times (when I am feeling lonely or not having a good ”single girl” day) I look to my friends as an example that it’s not just me, that I am not alone, and I’m not “less than” just because I happen to be single. And as selfish, superficial or immature as it may seem, it’s a little comforting to know that I am not rowing this “single girl boat” alone.  We are each other’s example that we are “ok” and personally, sometimes I need a reminder.   Being a single woman, I have the luxury of going out for drinks, to parties, dinner or whatever, whenever I feel like it.  It’s the part of being single with no children that I love… No one to answer to, but myself...  There are some great single girl outings that my friends and I frequent throughout the Chicagoland area.

Urban Fetes is a prominent event planning and marketing company that specializes in creating unique events for young professionals.  The company throws monthly Mix & Mingle events and other social events for young professionals.  My friends and I also manage to spot “a few good men” while attending these events, which is always a plus!! You and your friends should check some of these events out! Visit their website for upcoming events at www.urbanfetes.com

My girls and I also like to do “out of the box” activities... Fun themed parties are always things we like to check out! Summer is FINALLY here and to kick it off we plan to attend a "We Miss Da 90s" themed party! This event is a tribute to the era we all know and love and my girls and I are super excited!! Its coming up THIS Thursday July 21st at Saw Tooth restaurant in Chicago.  My girls and I are excited to throw on our gear and dance to music from a time we all know and love! You should join us!! 1350 W. Randolph, Chicago, IL

Being single CAN be fun.  I, for one, am having a blast, for now… (LOL).  Find a way to stay active while you are single; enjoy your life and the people in it! These are the best times of our lives, and I don’t know about you, but I plan to LIVE IT UP!!

Table for One please… Enjoying my life… Love me or leave me alone!

BACK TO HAPPY TIP: NEVER feel sorry for yourself! Everything happens for a reason.  Find a way to do things that make you happy! Make your own smiles! It’s SO worth it!

Thursday, June 7, 2012

Almost

Pandora is a wonderful music app that I use on my phone every day.  It actually gets me through my day! And although I listen to a variety of stations, depending on my mood, the Tamia station is my absolute favorite and the one I listen to most.  Not too lovey dovey but its mellow enough to keep me jamming throughout the day! For the most part the rotation is not repetitive but these last few days “Almost” a song by Tamia plays at least twice and I’m not sure if I’m paying more attention to the lyrics because it’s very relevant to a recent situation… but the words really have me thinking about a certain someone.

Here’s the chorus:
I missed the times that we almost shared
I miss the love that was almost there
I miss the times that we use to kiss
At least in my dreams
Just let me take my time and reminisce I miss the times that we never had
What happened to us we were almost there
Whoever said it's impossible to miss when you never had
Never almost had you  

Whatever happens to the ones who get away? I haven’t had very many “Almost” experiences since I’ve been dating but the one I did have was great! It was a wonderful feeling to date someone who I felt genuinely liked me as much as I liked him… I didn’t feel the need to hold back or follow any dating rules, with this one, I was too afraid of not saying enough, so I laid it ALL out on the table. But for some reason things kept going wrong. And at first I tried to use these “mishaps” as bumps in the road to test my true interest in this person but they continued! Things would go great, and the feelings I got when I was around him, ridiculous… But after a while something else would go wrong. 

I really couldn’t understand what was going on… My family and friends were not happy with my involvement with him and usually I value their opinions but there was no stopping me from spending time with this man! It just felt way too good when I was around him! And for the first time… HE LIKED ME TOO! LOL Yall know my issues have been finding someone who I am interested in, just as much as they are interested in me, and I was so excited because I thought that I had finally found that! Well, I guess I was wrong, because everything was “almost” there… I feel like some higher power was intervening whispering “This isn’t the one..” I say whisper because it took me a while to actually listen. 

Some things just aren’t meant to be.  And the fact that “this one” didn’t work out makes me a little sad…  I still think about him sometimes and what could have been, and every time I think back to what we “almost” had I realized that it simply took too much effort.  And although I still like him, I realize that we will never truly be anything because “almost” doesn’t count…

Table for One please… wanting it ALL… Love me or leave me alone :-)

BACK TO HAPPY TIP: Our conscious tells us things… and if we just listen, we might avoid a little heartache.