Making You Wait

Let me first start by saying that I absolutely LOVE Jill Scott’s new CD, “In the Light of the Sun”.  It’s been in the CD player in my car, since last summer and I can’t take it out.  I’m enjoying the music so much and able to relate to a lot of the subjects she’s speaks about.  The songs about relationships and dating are the ones that touch me the most, because it is my current reality.

One particular song I kept going back to is called “Making You Wait”; it talks about taking a new relationship to the next level.  When is it too soon?  And ladies, when we wait, are we waiting because we feel we have to, so we aren’t viewed in a certain light?  Or are we waiting because we think we have to, in order to have a real chance at building a real relationship with the person we are dating?

Steve Harvey says, we should wait 90 days…

“In 90 days, they have checked you out. They determined if you were easy to work with, if you got along well with others, if you showed up when you said you were going to show up, if you were worthy.”
This is essentially what Jill is saying in her song as well…

“I’m making you wait/ Never too late/ I need to know if you’re worthy/ I’m making you wait/ Not to frustrate/ I need to know if you’re crazy”

Ladies, you do know that we have the power, right?  That whether or not a relationship goes to the next level is completely up to us!  Now, we just have to determine, personally, if we want to wait a certain amount of time and if so, for what purpose?  I don’t think that caring about developing a sour reputation or trying to snag a man is a good enough reason for me.  I also don’t practice the 90-day rule.  I think that time will tell; in some cases it may not take that long and in others it may take longer to know when the time is “right”.

I think it goes back to self-worth, like Jill and Steve both state… “Are you worthy”?  I believe “all of me” is something that should be earned and it really depends on where you are in your life!  Some people are looking to have a great time and live life in a way that is carefree and could care less about building relationships (and there is nothing wrong with that).  I think that people should live their lives the best way they see fit.  Personally, I am in a different place in my life…a place where relationships are important and having people who will bring positive interaction and opportunities into my life is essential.
If I live my life with a “fly by the seat of my pants” attitude, I could possibly get what I am looking for, but I think taking the physical out and actually getting to know the person I am dating is the path I am currently choosing to take.  I AM NOT a prude, I still want to have fun, but I want to know that the person I am dating is worthy of receiving all that I have… And it’s definitely worth the wait!

Table for One please… knowing my worth… Love me or leave me alone…

BACK TO HAPPY TIP: It’s ok to stick to what you believe in. Never sacrifice YOUR happiness for someone else’s.


  1. I agree I don't think that either Steve or Jill is saying 3 months then lets "rock the boat" but long enough to really know the person. I need to know how we connect if we are are the same page when it comes to relationships. Honestly I know within the first two minutes of conversation if I am sexually attracted to him. That dont mean he gettin' my "cookies" though lol

    1. IKR Boogie, I mean I for one, KNOW FOR SURE whether they have any kind of chance to "get it" when I first meet them but like Jill said, I need to know if they are worthy and make sure they aren't crazy! LOL Thanks for your comment!

  2. Great Points Courtney! Personally I feel, there is no time frame on time limit that you can put on knowing the value of a relationship. Sometimes it takes an enormous amount of time spent in a relationship, to truly know that person and sometimes even time is not enough. It is important tnat you start the relationship on a good "note", where both parties are comfortable. All in all have fun! And.....I also love me some Jill Scott!!!


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